Why ungodly emotions should not be merely "managed?"

 

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          Ungodly emotions should not merely be managed because Scripture calls believers to a far deeper work—the transformation of the heart through sanctification, not just behavior modification.  Scripture consistently teaches that God desires not just outward control, but inward transformation. Management focuses on controlling external responses, while biblical sanctification addresses the root, which is the heart—the seat of our desires, thoughts, and will (Prov. 4:23; Matt. 15:18–19). Emotions—like thoughts and actions—are rooted in the heart, and Scripture calls for the heart to be surrendered to God, not simply restrained.

The Call to Surrender Emotions to God (Emotions Must Be Spirit/Word Regulated):
          Emotions reflect what we love, believe, and value. Therefore, ungodly emotions reveal disordered worship—when our affections are set on idols rather than God (Col. 3:5). Instead of masking or suppressing emotions like anger, fear, jealousy, or despair, Scripture calls us to repent of misplaced desires and beliefs that produce them. For example, "be angry and do not sin" (Eph. 4:26) implies not the removal of emotion, but its submission to righteousness.
          In 2 Corinthians 10:5, Paul urges believers to “take every thought captive to obey Christ,” which includes thoughts and feelings. As Brian Borgman explains in his book Feelings and Faith, “the goal is not emotional suppression but emotional sanctification.” This process doesn’t start with managing feelings but repenting from sinful responses, mortifying the flesh (Rom. 8:13), and seeking renewal through the Spirit (Rom. 12:2). God doesn’t call us to deny emotions, but to regulate them with truth. This means evaluating our emotional responses in light of Scripture, and reshaping them through renewed thinking:

“Do not be conformed to this age, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind…”
— Romans 12:2, CSB

       
          Emotions must submit to truth, just like behavior must. Godly emotions are not marked by their intensity, but by their alignment with God’s will and character. Here are are a few common examples:

• Ephesians 4:26 – “Be angry and do not sin” shows that even justified emotions can become sinful if not regulated.
• Psalm 42:5 – The psalmist speaks to his own soul: “Why, my soul, are you so dejected? Put your hope in God…” He’s not suppressing emotion; he’s redirecting it toward truth.
• Galatians 5:22-23 – The fruit of the Spirit includes self-control, which applies not only to actions but also to emotions.

The Heart is the Source of Emotions and Must Be Transformed:

                    “Keep your heart with all vigilance, for from it flow the springs of life.”
                                                                                                     – Proverbs 4:23

                    “The good person out of the good treasure of his heart produces good,
                    and the evil person out of his evil treasure produces evil, for out of the
                    abundance of the heart his mouth speaks.”
                                                                                                    – Luke 6:45
 
          The heart is typically described as the control center of life. Ungodly emotions arise not randomly but from within. They function as indicators, much like warning lights on the dashboard of a car. When we experience strong emotions—whether anger, fear, despair, or jealousy—they are pointing us to something deeper: our beliefs, desires, and values. This means that simply managing your emotional outbursts will not address the root problem; God desires a transformed heart, not merely modified behavior.  

          As Luke 6:45 demonstrates, Jesus taught that everything we do—including how we feel—flows from the heart within.  Emotions are one of the ways our heart "overflows." They are not separate from our spiritual condition—they expose what we truly believe, want, and love.

• Anger may reveal a love for control or a desire for justice on our terms
• Anxiety may expose a fear of losing what we treasure or not trusting God's sovereignty.
• Sadness can reveal deep longing or loss—but also an idol that we’ve depended on too much.
• Envy can reveal discontent with God’s provision and a heart that worships status or recognition.

          Again, these emotional responses are not random—they flow from the desires and passions of the heart (see also James 4:1-2).  But Scripture warns us that the heart can be deceived:



                    “Put to death therefore what is earthly in you: sexual immorality, impurity,
                      passion, evil desire, and covetousness, which is idolatry.”
                                                                                                    – Colossians 3:5

          When emotions like envy, bitterness, rage, or selfish sorrow rule us, they often expose idols—things we love more than God. We are not called to manage these sinful patterns but to mortify them—put them to death. Management may keep them hidden; submission brings them into the light for transformation.

We Are Called to Take Every Thought Captive:
                    “We destroy arguments and every lofty opinion raised against the
                      knowledge of God, and take every thought captive to obey Christ.”
                                                                                                    – 2 Corinthians 10:5

          This applies to emotions as well as thoughts, since emotions are often fueled by what we think and believe. Rather than being controlled by feelings, we are called to examine them in light of Christ’s truth and bring them under His Lordship.

The Process of Sanctification and Emotional Change:

• Repentance – Recognizing that emotions like bitterness, anxiety, or selfish sorrow are rooted in misplaced trust or desires (Jer. 17:9; James 4:1–2). As A. Craig Troxel writes,  in his book With All Your Heart: Orienting Your Mind, Desires, and Will toward Christ, “Our reasoning is inseparably bound up with our affections and feelings”, so repentance must address the inner person, not just surface emotions.
• Mortification – Putting to death the sinful desires or thought patterns that fuel ungodly emotions. Romans 6:6–12 calls believers to “not let sin reign in your mortal body.” This includes not allowing emotions to control one’s life or dictate decisions.
• Transformation – Through God’s Word and Spirit, believers can develop godly emotions—love, joy, peace, and godly sorrow (Gal. 5:22–23; 2 Cor. 7:10). In the book Untangling Emotions, J. Alasdair Groves and Winston T. Smith biblically affirm that emotions “are meant to be deeply shaped by what we value, what we believe, and ultimately, whom we worship.”

Again, the Goal is to Be Transformed, Not Merely Controlled:

                    “Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the
                     renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is
                     the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.”
                                                                                                    – Romans 12:2

          This transformation includes our emotional life. We are not called to act like Christians externally while remaining unchanged internally. God wants our thoughts, desires, and emotions renewed through His Word and Spirit.

The Fruit of the Spirit is the Result of Surrender, not Suppression:

                    “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness,
                    goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control...”
                                                                                                    – Galatians 5:22–23

          These are not personality traits or emotion-management techniques. They are spiritual fruits, produced when we walk by the Spirit and crucify the flesh (Gal. 5:24). We must surrender our fleshly emotions and yield to the Spirit, who brings about lasting change.  The goal is not to cope or manage your feelings, but to have lasting heart change.

Why This Matters: A Godly Heart-Oriented Approach:
          Craig Troxel, in his book With All Your Heart, emphasizes that the heart is a “trinity of spiritual functions: the mind, the desires, and the will.” What this means is that simply managing emotions addresses the output, but not the engine of the heart driving them. The Bible's process of sanctification calls us to bring every part of the heart into submission to Christ, not just external feelings. Therefore, the Christian life is not about emotionally coping, but about victory over sin and being conformed into the image of Christ (Rom. 8:29). Ungodly emotions should be brought to the cross, confessed honestly, and transformed through the Spirit and truth, not merely restrained.

Conclusion:
          The Bible makes it clear: managing emotions is not enough. Ungodly emotions must be confessed, crucified, and replaced with godly ones through the power of the Holy Spirit and the truth of God's Word. God’s desire is not just better behavior, but a renewed heart that reflects His holiness and love (Ezek. 36:26–27). To simply manage ungodly emotions is to treat the symptoms without healing the heart. God calls us to something far better—a life of ongoing repentance, heart renewal, and transformation into Christlikeness. Through His Spirit and Word, our emotions can be reoriented to reflect what God loves, values, and desires, so that our entire inner life glorifies Him (2 Cor. 3:18).

References: (Recommended Reading)

• Anxious for Nothing: God’s Cure for the Cares of Your Soul. John MacArthur (David C. Cook, 2012). 224 pgs. ISBN: 978-1434702975.
• Feelings and Faith: Cultivating Godly Emotions in the Christian Life. Brian S. Borgman (Crossway, 2009). 240 pgs. ISBN: 978-1433503634.
• Untangling Emotions. J. Alasdair Groves and Winston Smith (Crossway, 2019). 224 pgs. ISBN: 978-1433557828.
• Uprooting Anger: Biblical Help for a Common Problem. Robert D. Jones (P&R Publishing, 2005) 208 pgs. ISBN: 978-1596380059.
• With All Your Heart: Orienting Your Mind, Desires, and Will toward Christ. A. Craig Troxel (Crossway, 2020). 224 pgs. ISBN: 978-1433535536.
• The Christian Counselor’s Manual. Jay Adams (Zondervan, 1986). 496 pgs. ISBN: 978-0310511502.

"Jesus answered and said to him, “Truly, truly, I say to you, unless one is born again he cannot see the kingdom of God.”   -- John 3:3

Have you been born again?  The Bible says all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God and that the wages of sin is death.  However, there is Good News!  The Bible also says that the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord (Romans 3:23 and 6:23).  Is Jesus Christ your personal Lord and Savior?  If not, why not?